(Not So) Elite Penguin Force: Chill's Rescue

Prologue: Chill Gets Kidnapped
"Mwahahahahaha!" laughed Herbert.

"Dudes. Seriously. Who gave you the key to my house?" Chill asked.

"Durr...You don't have a key." Klutzy said even though he can't talk.

"Darn." Chill said.

Suddenly Herbert, Klutzy, Protobot and the Test Bots hauled Chill away. He got out his spy phone.
 * Chill: Mario! Help! I'm kidnappe-
 * ERROR ERROR 404

"Oh no!" Mario said. He ran out to Chill's Igloo in VIDEO GAME FORMATZ! :O

Level 1: Chill's Igloo
Text change - "null" to null: null

Author: Ooops.

Mario: Um, hey, who are you?

Author: It's a secret. >:)

Shy Guy and Goomba walk in, who are no longer secretive about their identity.

Shy Guy and Goomba: His name is Koopa!

Koopa: Cr-

Everyone in the story except Koopa: KEEP IT G-RATED!

Koopa: Sorry.

Anyways, Mario is in Chill's Bedroom. There are weird-looking robots running around. Mario runs into the hallway and a dinosaur traps him and talks to him.

Dinosaur: You get 5 power stars in each level. Get them all, rescue Chill.

Mario: How do you know about Chill?

Dinosaur: Silence, nonbeliever!

Mario jumps into the attic. A giant robot greets him.

Tin Robot: Moo ha ha ha ha ha!!!!

Mario: Oh man. Chill's Dumb Laugh of Stupidity!!!!

Mario loses 1 HP from the un-epicness. That's weird.

Tin Robot: Beat me! Moo ha-

Mario stuffs duct tape on Tin Robot's mouth. Boss music plays. Wee.

Tin Robot: MPPPPPH MPPH! (You'll never defeat me!!!! >:D)

Mario pulls out the Mega Super-Ultra Epic Whatever Mallet.

LMGT: ...??? FOOOOOD!

LMGT jumps into a hole in the attic and lands on an ice cream truck.

Mario smashes Tin Robot to bits with his Blah Blah Blah Mallet. He is about to grab the star when some brown blur grabs it.

Morton: Hahahayoucantgetthisstarbecauseigotpaidtodoitbyherbertandilikeweddingcakebecauseitsgoodand-

Mario pounds Morton into oblivion. He gets the star.

Mario: Onto the next star!

Coins --- FIND MY STUFFZ! --- Timed Challenge --- Mystery --- Boss --- (bold is the stuff that Mario got)

The piece of the floor where Mario was standing suddenly opens. He falls down and lands on a couch.

Annoying Piggy Bank That Talks A Lot: Gimme 50 coins, moolah, dough, mon-

Roy: SHADDUP!

Annoying Blah Blah Blah aka Piggy Bank: How insulting! I can-

SMASH!

Pieces of glass fly everywhere. Mario collects the star.

Stars: 2/5 (Coins, Boss)

Cuz the old thingy was annoying. Deal with it.

A sheep jumps off a random shelf. Don't ask why it was there. Another one jumps down the whole in the attic. They are for some odd reason attracted to Mario's TNT and pie that he has in his pocket.

CHA-CHING CHING

Mario: I guess that's the "FIND MY STUFFZ!" mission.

2/5 Sheepy sheeps. Why are they called sheepy sheeps? Cuz I feel like it. Deal with it.

Mario: Are there going to be a lot of "Cuz insert remark here. Deal with it." jokes in this story?

Koopa: Yes. :)

A shell falls out of a book for no reason. Koops pops out of it.

Koops: Pie Control to Major Yum, we have eaten all your pi-ie-ie!!

Vivian: Shut up!

Super Mario: ...

Koops: But it's my favorite song!

Goombella: Well if ya wanna get the 50 Power Stars to get 130876193846750913478598423156941387509613980 passes to Pie Land, your gonna have to stop. Unless you can walk and sing. And I know you can't multitask. Which is annoying because...

Mario ditches them. (Yup, they're trying to get the stars too. Mario has competition now. :D) Anyways, he runs to the basement, and falls down the stairs.

Mario: OWOWOOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOOWOWOWOWOOWOWO!

One quick cast-a-majig later...

Mario: Ow.

Mario runs on squishy green stuff. It's leaking from someplace...

Meanwhile, from the someplace where the blah blah blah is leaking...

Axem Red: Yay. Now we can get revenge on Chill and fill his house with green stuff!

Meanwhile, in Chill's basement...

Mario: Ow! It burns!

Mario gets fried into his head. He turns to normal a second later because otherwise the story couldn't continue.

Random person in crowd watching: Why?

Koopa: Cuz it would be too hard. Deal with it.

Mario steps on a Mr. Potato Head. It's wearing a party hat that Chill made.

Potato: Here! Take this bouncy ball! You can ride across green stuff with it.

Mario jumps on the ball and rides it across the goo. But he can't because it fries the ball to ashes. Yup, the potato dude ripped him off. Meanwhile, a sheep runs over to Mario, but doesn't get fried because of the strongness of the bond between the sheep and the TNT and the pie. Yup, this story is WEIRD.

Mario: Yay. 3 sheep.

The Hydra pops out of the ground for no reason, but bumps it's heads...Yuck! On a shelf and the star falls down.

MARIO GOT THE MYSTERY STAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11!111111111111111111111111111111111

Mario: ...

Mario gets lazy so he teleports into the garage. For some reason, GGD's limo is there.

Mario: Why is GGD's limo here?

FLASHBACK!

GGD: And my limo goes to Chill and my collection of Total Drama DVD's goes to Ben and-

Chill: SWEET! I get GGD's limo!

Chill jumps in the limo and drives it into his garage.

GGD: Wait! I'm not dead yet! :\

END FLASHBACK!

Mario: Oh...

GGD smashes through the garage door and drives his limo away. He ends up plowing over some random robot.

Random Robot: Hey!

GGD: Too bad!

Mario shrugs.

Toy Car: Race me, and I give you a star. Oh, you have to win.

Mario and Toy Car race. But, Mario doesn't see Toy Car and crushes him.

Toy Car: Ack...you...win...

Toy Car drives outside. But Mario doesn't wait, because Mario pretty much fried his internal systems so he takes 2 hours to get out there.

Mario: Hey. He didn't give me the-

The star flies into Mario's flippers. Suddenly, the TTYD party bursts in.

Koops: Not so fast! (sniffs) Do I smell pie?

The TTYD party attacks Mario. But, because they're made of paper nothing happens. Vivian grabs hold of the star. She yanks it out of Mario's flippers, but Mario gets some scissors.

Vivian: SCISSORS!!!!!!! :O

Mario chops Vivian in half. The two pieces fall to the ground flat.

Bobbery: Let's run!

The TTYD party runs off (without Vivian) and searches for stars outside. Mario picks up the star.

Mario: Onto the next (and last) star!

Suddenly a sheep jumps off a shelf and Mario collects it. He runs to the kitchen and collects another sheep. The Big Bad Wolf is standing on the table for no reason. Mario jumps on it, and it breaks. The Big Bad Wolf and the sheep explode, and a star lands in Mario's hand. He explodes.

Level 2: Chill's Neighborhood
Mario is seen blasting out of one of Chill's windows. He crashes in his yard. A lawnmower is running loose.

Mario: But Chill doesn't have grass...

The lawnmower explodes. A snow blower is running loose. Mario decides to talk to Grass Guy. (A guy made out of grass. Duh.)

Grass Guy: If you find my 5 Grassicles, I'll give you a star! If you eat any, then I'll blow you up.

Mario: O_O

32867 Grass Guys start running at Mario. Awesome music plays. Yaaay.

Grass Guys: WHICH ONE OF US IS REAL?

Suddenly 32866 Grass Guys explode.

Lone Grass Guy: TRAITORS!

Mario collects the Lone Grass Guy. The awesome music decides to leave. :( Anyway, Mario runs out of the yard. He sees the TTYD party fighting with Toy Car.

Toy Car: HACKKKPTH! Nooo! I don't have a star! HACK!

Toy Car spits up some toy parts into Goombella's mouth.

Goombella: ACK! I'M CHOKING!

Ludwig flies in on a wig. He leaves.

Koopa: :P

Mario beats up the TTYD party.

Toy Car: HACK! If you beat me in this HACK race I'll give you a HACK star.

Mario races Toy Car again. But, Mario steps on Toy Car and he explodes, leaving a star behind. The TTYD party wakes up.

Goombella: My star!

Goombella grabs the star. Mario gets the scissors.

Goombella: SCISSORS!

Goombella meets the same fate as Vivian. Mario grabs the star and he has 1/5.

Koops: Uh oh. Umm, let's run!

The TTYD party flees.

A tree grows out of nowhere. Mario climbs it, and Piggy Bank is on it.

Piggy Bank: 50 coins for a star!

Mario gives Piggy Bank 50 coins and now has 2/5 stars. At the top of the tree, he sees two Grass Guys and a kite that looks like Herbert. He collects the Grass Guys.

Herbert Kite: Muh! Muh! Muh huh huh!

Lord Crump: YOU STOLE MY LAUGH!!!

Herbert Kite: Well sorrryyy, Lord Crumpet.

Lord Crump explodes. Herbert Kite PWNs Mario. He gets sent to Zee Underwear Drawer.

Mario: AHHHH!

Mario falls in a giant underwear.

Random Guy: Welcome to Zee Underwear Drawer, where people who's whose huhz I can never say that anyway this is where you go when you get a GAME OVARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111

Mario: Oops.

York: Yo, Mario.

Mario: Ben? York? Kirby? Explorer? What are you guys doing here?

Explorer: Well, it's a long story...

IMPORTANT: Remember how LMGT said Ben, York, Kirby and Explorer went on a vacation during Puffle Lawn Chair? Well, they were on a ship and...

FLASHBACK!

Ben: OMG IT'S SINKING! Quick! Get the carts!

Ben gets shopping carts and tosses them overboard for no reason.

Kirby: ......

York: Fly away, Jasper!

Jasper flies off into a cloud shaped like a house.

Jasper: Yay! The Cloud House!

Jasper starts watching TV.

Explorer: BLUB!

The ship sinks.

GAMEOVER GAMEOVER GAMEOVER GAMEOVER!

END FLASHBACK!

Mario: Oh.

Captain Str00del: I know how to get out!

Mario: I thought you weren't real.

Ben: NOO! WHY DID YOU SAY THAT!

Captain Str00del: Oops.

Captain Str00del disappears.

Ben kills Mario, York, Kirby and Explorer. They appear in Chill's Neighborhood.

Ben: ...Rats.

Mario: DURRRRR!

York: Thanks!

York, Kirby and Explorer run off. Mario eats a piece of fence and blasts into the treehouse. It explodes, sending Mario (and a star) into a playground. Mario collects the star and now he has 3/5. :) Mario grabs a Grass Guy and runs into the fence that he ate. He shakes a tree and a Grass Guy comes out.

Mario: Only one left!

Mario jumps in the pool and grabs a star.

Mario: Cool! 1 star and 1 Grass Guy!

The pool blows up, and Mario gets sent into somebody's yard. A dog eats him. He gets sent to Zee Underwear Drawer.

Mario: NOOOO!

Ben kills Mario again. He reappears by the dog. He runs away from it. Tons of clothes bury the dog, and a Grass Guy appears. Mario collects it, and the dog smacks Mario into Chill's yard. He returns the Grass Guys and gets the star.

Mario: Ya-

Mario explodes.

Level 3: Whatcha Doing?
Mario is seen flying into a yard that is separated from the world somehow.

???: Ha ha ha!

A penguin with a hood steps out of the shadows.

???: Finally! After not being seen since Chapter 1 of the story before the last story I get an appearance!

The Fourth Wall squishes ???.

???: Ow. Anyways...

??? takes off his hood to reveal he is WATuDOIN!!!

WATuDOIN: Now I'll defeat you and then with Chill gone, I can take over and become the main character of Not So EPF! Woowooha!!

WATuDOIN makes lightning strike...And totally misses.

WATuDOIN: Aw.

Wario: Wahaha!

Wario steps on WATuDOIN for no reason.

WATuDOIN: Ow.

Mario smashes WATuDOIN into the distance with his Blah Blah Blah Mallet.

WATuDOIN: IF IT WEREN'T FOR YOU MEDDLING HEROES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *twink*

Mario explodes.

Level 4: Construction Yard
We see Mario flying into the base for a new building.

Mario: Yay. A new Wal-Mart. Not that I need one.

FLASH!

Random Dude: Welcome to Wal-Mart!

Some Guy: Welcome to Wal-Mart!

Five More PPL: Welcome to Wal-Mart!

Torpedo Ted: I'm a torpedo!

Mario: WAUUUUUGH!

BACK!

Piggy Bank topples off a random trailer. Mario gives him 50 coins and gets a star. (1/5) He runs over to some guy that looks like a basketball. An egg jumps on Mario for no reason. (Yup, there's eggs that attack Mario now too. PREPARE FOR A RUNNING GAG!)

Basketball Guy: Find the Abbleala Guys (aka Apple Guys) and I'll give you a star.

Mario: This is weird. First sheepy sheeps, grass guys, and apple guys. What's with the weird names?

Koopa: Cuz they're fun. Deal with it.

Mario: :|

Mario runs in some building.

Bill Gate$: Hi!

Mario: O_O

Mario throws TNT at Bill Gate$. The explosion spills paint everywhere, which actually makes the paints Mario needs to get the star. It appears out of nowhere. (2/5) However, an Apple Guy falls of a filing cabinet and Mario collects it. The building explodes for no reason.

Mario: Um, ow?

An egg attacks Mario. He jumps into a dump truck. He finds an Apple Guy and collects it. He jumps on the structure of Wal-Mart because there are Apple Guys and a star up there. :) Anyways, he runs when he gets squished by a pillar-majig!

Mario: Ow.

Suddenly, a bunch of chili peppers bury Mario and burn him into an over-burnt waffle!

Mario: I think the author hates me.

Mario drinks a mushroom soda and turns to normal. He keeps running and grabs an Apple Guy.

Mario: Heh heh.

Mario gets a rope and climbs to the top because there wasn't anything important under there anyway. :P

Jackhammer: WAAAAAAAAAAH! YOU CHEEEEEEATED! TAKE THIS!!!

Jackhammer starts chasing Mario around and throws chili peppers. He is about to get chased off a beam but he grabs an Apple Guy off the edge. He throws it at Jackhammer, which ricochets back at him and Mario collects it. Jackhammer gets knocked over and Mario buries him in TNT. It goes off, which sends Wal-Mart toppling down. He sees Mega Dog Who Has Really Hard And Annoying Challenges That Take 1,000 Tries.

Mega Dog Blah Blah Blah: Nooooooooo! :( You blew up Wal-Mart! Now you can't do my challenge.

Mega Dog Blah Blah Blah forfeits the star. A star also lands on Mario for defeating the Jackhammer. (4/5) Mario runs to Basketball Guy and gives him the Apple Guys. He gets the last star and explodes.

Level 5: Allies and Gullies
We see Mario crashing into the ally of some apartments. For some reason it's huge and there's a market.

Rip Cheato: Get everything here FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEee HACK GAG COUGH!

Rip Cheato faints.

Mr. L's theme song plays.

Mr. L: Wahaha! It's a-me! Mr. L!!!!!!!!!!

Mr. L faints and explodes for no reason.

Mario: :|

Mario finds Piggy Bank at the market. He gives him 50 coins and gets a star. (1/5) He finds a duck.

Duck: Find my babies! Find my babies! Find my babies! x24

A pond randomly appears and Mario jumps in it. He gets a Baby Duck. He finds a star in a trash can. (2/5) Then he smashes down a fence and falls into a sewer. Mega Dog Blah Blah Blah is there.

Mega Dog Blah Blah Blah: Find all my bones in 2 seconds!

2..........................................................

Mario collects 1/5.

2 and a half...............................................

Mario collects 2/5.

2 and 3 quarters...........................................

Mario collects 3/5.

1..........................................................

Mario collects 4/5.

1 and a half...............................................

Mario collects 5/5.

Mega Dog Blah Blah Blah: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Mega Dog Blah Blah Blah gives Mario the star. (3/5)

Mario: Thank-a you!

Mario jumps out of the sewer and decides to climb somebody's house. He finds a duck up there, but he realizes he forgot some. He pulls out a magnet and two more ducks come. He climbs onto somebody's roof and a clown attacks him.

BANG ZOOM!

Mario: SUPER ULTRA MEGA TNT MULTI-TOSS!

Mario throws 2037513490857913857190386098761986791876098475109834760913485091437860179860138476031987460174091 TNT sticks in 1 second. Clown explodes, and so does the house.

Penguin By The Igloos Near The Plaza: RAWR! EVERYONE MESSES UP MY HOUSE!

Mario grabs the star, and dropkicks PBTINTP. Suddenly the TTYD party appears.

Ms. Mowz: You're not getting the star this time!

Goom/bella: That's right!

Vivi/an: Or my name isn't Vivian!

Mario: How did you two...

Goombella: We got taped back together. :D

Mario chops up Flurrie.

Chill57181: Thank you. I hated her.

TTYD Party: Yaay! No more Flurrie!

Mario: Hey, what's up with Professor Frankly's theme?

Super Mario: ???

Koopa: That's the theme for the TTYD party now. :)

Mario crumples the TTYD party up and throws them somewhere. Somehow they turn to normal. They run away.

Mario: Yay!

Mario collects the star. (4/5)

Mario runs to Duck and returns the Baby Ducks. He gets a star (5/5) and explodes.

Level 6: Hey, Kid! Let's Have Some Fun
We see Mario crashing into somebody's house (yup, still in the ally). A trash can tips over. Mario fixes it. However a green penguin pops out.

Green Penguin: Scram! ...Whoops... @#%*! It's Mario!

Mario: Funkid...

Funkid: Wuh! Wuh! Wuh huh huh!

Lord Crump: Why does everyone steal my laugh?!?!?

Koopa: Shut up, Lord Crumpet!

Lord Crump: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Lord Crump explodes.

Funkid throws swear words!!! :O COVER UR EARZZ!!!

Hat Pop: MY EARZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mario: I want an RPG battle!

Mario and Funkid appear on an RPG-ish-stage-a-ma-bob.


 * Mario: 10/10
 * Funkid: 10/10

Funkid gets the first strike!

Funkid uses Swear Word!

Mario uses Logic!

RPG-ish-stage-a-ma-bob uses blow up!

Mario: WHA?

Koopa: My contract says you guys can't have an RPG battle.

Mario: :(

Funkid turns Mario into CPWSA and bombs it.

CPWSA: O_O

CPWSA turns back into Mario. He counterattacks with TNT. Funkid explodes, and Mario does too.

Level 7: Toy Barn Isle 1!
We see Mario flying into a barn. He crashes through a door labeled 1. Some toys fall off shelves.

Mario: ...TOY WORLD!

An egg attacks Mario.

Mario: EGGS!

???: HAR YA!

A plastic guy crashes into some bikes and explodes. Mario runs into an office-ish room. He blows up the filing cabinet and an egg and grabs the star. (1/5) He gives Piggy Bank 50 coins. (2/5) He runs into a storage room. A chick falls down and Mario collects it. He blows up some more eggs. He falls down a vent and lands in a room with a dragon. No, a three-headed... OH MY CHEEZZZZZZY! IT'S THE HYDRA!

Iceman: BROOOHAHA!

Bonechill: MINE!

Bonechill tackles Iceman (the Blue Hydra)

Iceman: :(

Mario: This will be easy!

The Cauldron 3000 appears. Mario hits it over Iceman.

Iceman: SWHMARSHWMAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Iceman explodes.

Thunderbolt (Yellow Hydra): You'll pay for that!

Mario pulls out the Puffle Shield! :D Thunderbolt blasts him but it goes back! Thunderbolt explodes!

Fireball (Red Hydra): :O

Fireball attempts to blow up Mario. Mario throws a snowball at him, and he malfunctions. The cockpit opens.

Mini-Dragon-Guy: No! No! No!!! IT'S NOT FAIR!

Mini-Dragon-Guy jumps out and attacks Mario. Mario blows him up with TNT and a star lands. However...

???: That star is ours!

Mario: What a minute...Professor Frankly...OH NOOOOO!

The TTYD party walks in.

Bobbery: Why haven't I gotten a line yet?

Koopa: You just did.

Bobbery: Oh.

Super Mario swipes the star. The TTYD party runs off.

Mario: HEY!

Mario chases them. They accidentally drop the star and Mario grabs it. (3/5) He runs and sees an Overalled Chicken.

Overalled Chicken: IF U CAN GET 2 MY EGG B4 TIME RUNS OUT, U CAN HAVE DA CHICK INSIDE.

Mario runs to the egg before the timer starts. When it starts, he takes the chick. Suddenly one gets attracted to his FIND MY STUFFZ! Magnet.

Mario: Just one left. :D

Mario runs back to Overalled Chicken.

Overalled Chicken: IF U CAN GET 2 MY EGG B4 TIME RUNS OUT, U CAN HAVE DA STAR INSIDE.

Mario runs to the egg before the timer starts. When it starts, he takes the star. (4/5) He runs down some random isle and finds a chick after evil planes attack him. He runs back and gives them to Cooking Chicken. (No, not food WAAA) He gets the last star (5/5) and explodes.

Level 8: Toy Barn Isle 2!
We see Mario crashing through the wall. He lands in a section of Toy World dedicated to...

LMGT: TEH SPACE!

LMGT hops on a donut and flies away. Mario runs into the arcade. An alien jumps out of a ball pit and Mario collects it. He plays a crane game and gets...A STARZ! :D (1/5) He runs back and tips over some boxes.

Mario Robot: BROOHAHAHA! BEAT ME FOR THE STAR!

Bonechill: MY LAUGH!

Bonechill beats up Mario Robot who explodes. Mario collects the star. (2/5)

Mario: Why are the bosses so easy?? O_O

Mario shrugs and crashes more boxes. He collects an alien and gives Piggy Bank 50 coins. (3/5) He keeps crashing boxes and gets another alien. Another alien gets attracted to his magnet. Mario crashes through a wall and meets an alien in a UFO.

Alien In A UFO: Beat me in a race for a star!

Mario zips to the finish line before Alien In A UFO can even start. A star falls down. Yup, you guessed who decided to come.

???: Umm, that star is rightfully ours, so, umm, don't take it.

The TTYD party comes.

Koops: Yeah, and, uh, if you do, umm....

Gonzales Jr. (Yoshi Kid): Gonzales will beat you up! :D

Mario gets out his scissors.

TTYD Party (except Super Mario): AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

Super Mario: ...

The TTYD party flees. An alien jumps off a shelf and Mario collects it, along with the star. (4/5) He crashes some boxes and gives the aliens to a UFO. He gets a star and explodes. (5/5)

Level 9: Toy Barn Isle 3! Encounter With Doopliss
We see Mario crashing into a spaceshippy place.

Doopliss: Hey, slick! Imma steal your identity and there's nothing that you can do about it! YUK YUK YUK YUK YUK-

5 hours later....

Doopliss: -YUK YUK YUK YUK YUK YUK YUK YUK YUK YUK YUK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mario: Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz........

Doopliss: WAKE UP!

Mario wakes up. Doopliss copies him.

Mario???: Wahaha! I am you and you are me...Huh?

Mario??? gets a bad case of logic.

Mario???: OH NOEZ!

Mario??? turns into Doopliss.

Doopliss: Aww. That's no fun.

Doopliss swoops into Mario. Mario smacks him backwards with his Blah Blah Blah Mallet. Doopliss ends up crashing out of the spaceshippy place.

Doopliss: I'll be back! And I me eeeeaan it!!

CRASH!

Mario explodes.

Level 10: Elevator Hop
We see Mario crashing into an elevator door...While the elevator is gone. He falls down the elevator shaft.

Mario: D'oh!!!

Mario runs into a room and gets zapped a half-million times. But he collects a Mickey Mouse. He runs back and climbs up the elevator shaft. He sees more eggs trying to attack him. Mario blows them up. Then he blows up some Potato Chip Bags. Why are all the enemies food? :| Oh, right, cuz I feel like it. Deal with it. Anyways, Mario wall jumps up and gets to deh control room.

Minnie Mouse: FIND MY MICKEYZ! And hey, line up the wire-a-doos to open the thingy-ma-bob.

Mario blows up the thingy-ma-bob instead. He sees a star just sitting there, too good to be true.

???: HALT!

The TTYD party walks to the star.

Goombella: We're not leaving without putting up a fight this time! Bring it on!

Mario pulls out the scissors.

Vivian: SCISSORS!

The TTYD party jumps off. Mario grabs the star (1/5) and a Mickey Mouse gets attracted to his magnet. Mario jumps on the elevator. He gets another Mickey Mouse.

Mario: OH NOEZ! I FORGOT TO GIVE PIGGY BANK TEH COINS!

Mario jumps off and gives Piggy Bank 50 coins. He gets a star (2/5) and wall jumps back to where he was. He gets to the top and jumps in a shaft. Why? Because there's a Mickey Mouse in it. Duh. Anyways, he eats a switch in there (?) and a shortcut appears! :D He jumps back to the top of the elevator and jumps to Goofy.

Goofy: Ulp yup!!!!! Beat za ztar to zee bottom! Yup!

Mario: Why are there so many Mickey Mouse references in this level?

Mario shrugs and goes down the race. He gets the star. (3/5) He takes the shortcut back up and give Minnie Mouse her Mickey Mouses. He gets another star. (4/5) He shortcuts to the top and sees a spider.

Mario: Good thing Chill isn't on this quest. That would totally freak him out.

Mario blows up the spider and gets the star. He explodes.

Level 11: Western Penthouse
We see Mario crashing into the floor of a western-themed penthouse. A chicken nugget attacks him, as well as a few bags of Potato Chips. Did I mention they were Ruffles Chips? Too bad. Mario crashes into the bathroom and gets a bunny. :) He runs back into the kitchen and gets another bunny. He runs back and a horse gives him 5 horseshoes to find.

Mario: Found them.

Mario gets a star (1/5) and runs down a hallway. A chicken nugget attacks him but Mario eats it. Mario runs into a bedroom. A star falls off the top of the bed. (It's a bunk-bed-ish) Mario collects it (2/5) and runs into another room. He gets a bunny. A bunny that Mario left in the bedroom gets collected by the magnet. A mean cowboy appears.

Mean Cowboy: RAWKHAWKHAWKHAWKAWKAWKAWKAWKAWKAWKAWK!

Rawk Hawk: !

Mario beats up Mean Cowboy and he explodes and drops a star. However... Oh yeah, and another bunny got attracted to Mario's magnet. Anyways...

???: MY STAR!

The TTYD party walks in.

Super Mario: You won't-a get the star.

TTYD Party (except Mario): !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MARIO SAID SOMETHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Super Mario takes the star but Mario pulls out his scissors.

TTYD Party: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Mario swipes the star as the TTYD party flees. (3/5)

Mario runs into the kitchen and gives The Doll With A Red Hat the bunnies. He gets a star (4/5) and runs into the bathroom. He gives Piggy Bank 50 coins and gets the last star. (5/5) He explodes.

Chapter 12: A Hydra Of A Time (Huh?)
We see Mario crashing onto another elevator thingy. Suddenly the hydra comes out of the hole.

Mario: I can tell that the author likes the Hydra.

Hydra: ROAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Iceman: Let me at him!

The Cauldron 3000 appears. Mario tosses the snowball at it.

Iceman: RAWR!!!

Iceman freezes Mario. Mario eats the ice even though he's frozen in it. He throws frozen custard at Iceman.

Iceman: OW!

Mario tosses a snowball at the Cauldron 3000.

Iceman: Ack...pth.....

Iceman falls into the hole. An epic explosion of confetti (?) happens.

Fireball: Buh! Buh! Buh huh huh!

Lord Crump beats up Fireball. Fireball falls into the hole and another epic explosion of confetti happens...Along with Crump's hat.

Thunderbolt: Uhhh...

Thunderbolt blasts stuff at Mario. Mario uses the Puffle Shield of Epicness and reflects it. Thunderbolt blows up. Mario explodes.

Chapter 13: Airport
We see Mario crashing into the interior of an airport. He is in the luggage place. He beats up some Ruffles Chips Bags. He blows up an egg. He runs across the luggage.

Mario: Weeee!

Mario collects an Apple Guy by accident.

Mario: Yay! The Apple Guys are back!

Mario does a weird dance. He finds Piggy Bank and gets the 50 Coin Star. (1/5) He runs out and blows up a chicken nugget. He sees THE WRESTLER OF EPICTOWN!!!!!!!

THE WRESTLER OF EPICTOWN: Find the wrenchamabobs.

Mario uses his magnet to get them all. He gives them to him and gets a star. (2/5) Mario runs off into a baggage place. He sees a chicken nugget and a conveyer belt. He jumps onto it and a Toy Story 2 DVD falls out of a luggage. Stinky Pete jumps out of it (somehow). Mario beats him up and gets a star. (3/5) He gets lazy and uses his magnet to get all the Apple Guys. He gives them to Basketball Pilot. He gets a star (4/5) Then Mario jumps on a plane for no reason and finds a star on it. He is about to grab it when...

???: Phew! We almost missed our appearance!

The TTYD party walks in.

Goombella: You are totally not getting the last star.

Koops: Pie Control to Major Yum, we have eaten all your pi-ie-ie!!

TTYD Party (except Koops): SHUT UP, KOOPS!

Koops: But it's my favorite song! Plus I love pie!

Mario: OMG! Me too!

Koops runs over to Mario.

KOOPS JOINED YOUR PARTY...Even though you don't have one. Nananananana!

TTYD Party (Koops isn't part of it anymore): AHHHHHHHHHHH!

The TTYD Party flees.

Koops: So boss, what do we do now?

Mario: Grab this star.

Mario grabs it (5/5) and he explodes. Koops explodes too.

Level 14: Trouble on the Road Place Thingy
We see Mario and Koops crashing out of the airport building.

Mario: Something excites me about this level... But what is it?

Koops: The next level is the last one.

Mario: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

Koops: YIPPE! Let's sing!

Mario: Pie Control to Major Yum-

Koops: -we have eaten all your pi-ie-ie!

Mario and Koops start doing the CP Dance.

Mario: OK. Let's-a go!

Mario and Koops run to Piggy Bank and give him 50 coins. They get a star as usual (1/5) and Piggy Bank says something.

Piggy Bank: This is the last time you get to see me. :(

Piggy Bank explodes. Mario gets all the coins he gave him. They crash into a control building somehow. Mario presses random buttons and a star appears. Mario collects it (2/5) and they run to the center of the airport where they meet Mega Dog Blah Blah Blah.

Mega Dog Blah Blah Blah: Beat this race in 20 seconds without eating or sleeping.

Mario and Koops beat the race in 19 seconds without eating or sleeping. Mega Dog Blah Blah Blah gives them the star (3/5) and 5 luggages get attracted to Mario's magnet.

Koops: O_O

Mario runs and finds Traveling Basketball Guy and gives him the 5 luggages. He gets the star (4/5) and jumps on a tower.

Game Boy Advance: HA HA HA. BEAT GAME BOY ADVANCE'S HOLO- *explodes*

A star falls and Koops lunges at it.

???: No can do, mister!

Koops falls.

Vivian: OK, this is the last straw! Hand over all your stars now, or you two are done for!

Mario pulls out the scissors.

TTYD Party: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

The TTYD Party flees. They jump onto the plane. Mario grabs the star (5/5) and Mario sees an SOS signal coming from the plane. He jumps in with Koops.

Level 15: Ultimate Showdown
Mario and Koops jump into the plane. He sees Chill.

Chill: MARIO! You made it!

Chill is about to run over to Mario when the Hydra comes up. For some reason, there is also a green one, orange one and purple one. The TTYD party walks in.

Chill: UGH!

Super Mario: Yes!

Goombella: You're no match for us now...

Gonzales Jr: Umm... He still has those scissors.

Vivian: SCISSORS!!!!!!!

Bobbery: Let's show them what a real sea bomb is made of!

Ms. Mowz: But I'm not a sea bomb.

Bobbery: Who cares?

(Note: Italic text is the pilots of the Hydra thinking)

Grassdude (Green Hydra): SHWMARSHWAMRMARSERIFSHGISURLSFISOISHLGSGILSDFISDIFOSIFOSDIFOSPDFISPDOGUSPIOGJSDOFIJSPGI!!!!!

Blastro (Orange Hydra): GWAR HA HA AHA HA AAHAJAHAH A!!!TryeUEIGUDIGYDFKGDHYKSFKUDYSI FUSN MEEJEEE!

Shroobio (Purple Hydra): $%$%*#&(#*@&%(*@&^(*&@#$(*&(% #*@&%(*@&^(*&@#$(*&(%]*@&(*^!

Fireball: Dudes. Speak English. (Wahaha! Mario is so going down!)

Grassdude spits out Grass Guys but Mario dodges them all. Blastro spits out gas, which is weird. Shroobio spits out mushrooms. Suddenly all the Hydras start attacking at once.

Mario: AHHHH!

Mario gets the Puffle Shield of Epicness and blasts Thunderbolt's beams back. He does this over and over while dodging the other Hydra's attacks.

Thunderbolt: NOOOOOO!!!!!! (Clickety click! :O)

Thunderbolt malfunctions.

Fireball: Bwahahaha!

Fireball attempts to burn Mario. Mario dodges and throws snowballs at Fireball. He malfunctions. The Cauldron 3000 appears and Mario keeps spilling lava on Iceman. He malfunctions. Mario starts throwing TNT at Grassdude, Blastro and Shroobio and they malfunction too. Suddenly the cockpits of the Hydras open.

Herbert (Fireball): Klutzy! Keep working!

Klutzy (Thunderbolt): Clickety click!

Protobot (Iceman): BZZZZZZZZZZZZK!

Wheel-Bot (Grassdude): And I'm supposed to just sit here? O_O

Snow-Bot (Blastro): IKR.

Jet-Bot (Shroobio): Wow. I think that was the first acronym Snow-Bot's ever used.

Mario: I'm too lazy to watch them fix the Hydra.

Koops: HEY! I NEVER GOT A LINE!

Koops beats up the autho-

BLACKOUT

Koops jumps in the author seat. He makes the Hydra explode. Suddenly the music that plays when you saved Peach in New Super Mario Bros. Wii plays. Chill smashes down the luggage. The last that is seen is Mario and Chill jumping off the airplane. They go back home.

Epilogue: Let's-a Party!
Johnny: So you did all that?!?!??

Mario: Yup.

LMGT: FOOOOOOD!

LMGT smashes into a table of food in the background.

Hat Pop: BUNNY EAR DANCE! ... I dunno how to do it.

Johnny: I is tired... I'm going home. Bye guys!

And so, Johnny waddled off to his igloo... But little did he know that something amazing would happen...

The End